Couples & Marriage Therapy in Santa Monica


Couples work and marriage counseling requires a commitment from both partners to enter into process wherein they can reveal themselves, untangle the expectations and projections that create conflict, and re-pattern unhealthy behaviors. Couples therapy offers a road map for a couple to forge a new image of themselves and their partnership.

One of the most difficult endeavors we can undertake is trying renegotiate our intimate relationships. It requires seeing conflict and challenges as invitations to change and evolve.  It requires the curiosity and courage to explore the implicit assumptions we have about ourselves, each other and the relationship, make them explicit, and decide if those initial assumptions still serve the relationship?  Or are they causing harm?

Relationships are incredibly complex. They require work. Maintaining love, intimacy and connection is an ongoing project and no couple is immune to difficulties. Love is not enough to bind a relationship together— especially in a world that is changing so rapidly.  Couples need resources to become resilient and skills to become emotionally intelligent so their relationship can grow and ultimately thrive.

My approach to couples therapy is to uncover the structure of the conflict as well as the underlying attachment needs that are not being met. Then move into emotional skillfulness and mindfulness techniques that can help couples identify their emotional reactivity and behavioral patterns to diffuse conflict more easily. Once these skills are in place, we can focus our attention on meaningful repairs, attunement, and connection that create the foundation for problem solving from a place of empathy and trust.

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.
— Marcel Proust

 Common Issues in Couples & Marriage Therapy

  • Deepening emotional Intelligence & Attunement

  • Working through patterns of mis-communication

  • Perpetual conflict and power struggles

  • Emotional withdrawal & stalemates

  • Stress & Work/ Life Balance

  • Trauma

  • Infidelity & Betrayal

  • Sexual Intimacy Issues & Desire Discrepancy

  • Disagreements over values and priorities including: money, sex, parenting, and creating time for each other.

  • Working through Codependency and Attachment Issues

  • Premarital Counseling: Defining Commitment & Trust

  • Discernment Therapy, Divorce Recovery & Conscious Uncoupling

Whether you are considering the next level of commitment, are in a committed relationship or marriage, considering separation, or processing a separation or divorce, therapy can be deeply empowering and healing.  I also treat same sex couples and families, siblings and business partnerships that are in need of fine tuning. You can gain a more expansive understanding of your relationship and a road map for resolving perpetual areas of conflict. Click on the button below to read more about frequently asked questions regarding therapy.